College students across the country are walking around pretending they’re fine.

They are not fine.

The quiet panic in the library? The shaky hands on a coffee cup?
That’s not dramatic. That’s finals.

Final exams turn normal, smart, capable students into anxious zombies.
Not because they aren't working. Not because they don’t care.
But because everything they’ve worked for is suddenly on the line.

And here’s the part no one says out loud:

Parents can make this easier… or harder.

Not by tutoring.
Not by nagging.
But by doing something much more powerful:

Becoming the calm in the chaos.

You Don’t Need to Know Calculus to Help

I remember when my son’s math grade tanked during his first year.

I did what any parent would do:

• I suggested office hours

• I looked up the tutoring options for him

• I sent motivational texts

He didn’t want any of it.

He didn’t need someone to reteach the derivatives.

He needed space.

Space to think.
Space to try.
Space to fail and try again.

It turns out the most stressful part of final exams isn’t the content — it’s the pressure.

The fear of disappointing the people you love.

The fear of losing scholarships or falling behind.

The fear of not being enough.

What changed everything that semester wasn’t a study hack.

It was dinner.

A normal dinner.

We ordered pizza, turned on a movie, and he got to just be a kid for 90 minutes.

That break?
He went back to work afterward.

Not because he had to.

Because he could breathe.

Your Student Needs Three Things During Finals

Not twenty.

Not a rescue mission.

Just three.

1) A calm home base.

When their world feels shaky, they need you steady.

Not hovering.
Not micromanaging.

Steady.

If anxiety is contagious, so is peace.

2) A plan they believe in.

Students don’t need motivation.
They need a plan that makes sense.

A rhythm:

• Study

• Break

• Move

• Hydrate

• Sleep

Repeat.

Systems beat talent during finals.
Every time.

3) A guaranteed landing spot after it’s over.

This matters more than you think.

When finals end, students are exhausted.
Mentally, physically, emotionally.

They’ve been performing under pressure for weeks.

They need a soft place to fall.

A safe landing.

That landing might look like:

• A trip to their favorite coffee shop

• A weekend home

• A family game night

• A nap on the couch with the dog

The activity doesn’t matter.
The message does:

You are still loved even if this didn’t go perfectly.

Stress Isn’t the Enemy — Isolation Is

You can’t remove the stress.
Final exams are stressful. They’re supposed to be. That’s how we grow.

But when students don’t feel alone, they can handle more than we think.

What breaks them is isolation.

That moment when they believe:

• “I’m failing.”

• “Everyone else has it together.”

• “I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

The fear of letting us down is heavier than any exam.

You don’t have to fix the material.
You only have to release the pressure.

“I love you. I’m proud of you. I’m here.”

That alone can shift a student from panic to possibility.

A Safe Landing Is the Secret to Resilience

Parents often ask me:

“What should we do when finals are over?”

My answer:

Celebrate effort, not outcome.

Effort is what they control.
Outcome is a mix of things — some outside their hands.

If you want a strong, resilient student, celebrate the behaviors you want repeated:

• Showing up

• Asking for help

• Studying consistently

• Managing time

• Trying again

The grade will work out.

And if it doesn’t?

You still celebrate the human being.

Because college is not a performance — it’s a process.

One Small Change Makes a Big Difference

You don’t need a grand plan.

You need one intentional rhythm.

One night this week, do this:

Remind them they’re loved.

That’s it.

You will be stunned at how much peace that creates.

Stress melts when students know they’re not alone.

The villain is not the exam.
It’s isolation, pressure, and silence.

The hero?

Your student.

You are the guide.

And the solution is simple:

Create a calm, consistent rhythm they can rely on.

Finals are tough.
But they are temporary.

Home is forever.